BPD Awareness
If you feel unsafe right now, please get help right away. If you are in the United States, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, or text HOME to 741741 to connect with the Crisis Text Line. If you are in immediate danger, call emergency services (911 in the US) or go to your nearest emergency department. This post is coaching, not therapy, and it does not diagnose or treat mental health conditions. If what you are reading brings up thoughts of harming yourself, please talk to a medical or mental health professional promptly — you do not have to carry this alone. May was designated as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Awareness Month. I myself was diagnosed with BPD 8 years ago and could just sit here and tick off statistic after statistic. However, I instead wish to raise awareness of this still highly stigmatized disorder through poetry and personal experience.
Daily Struggles Of BPD
Below is my own account of what those of us struggling with BPD deal with on a daily, often times hourly, basis:
I struggle with what is called bottle,
Also known as “a living hell”; Not only because of how it’s defined, But the stigma heaped on it as well.
We’re not all violent or downright mean,
Yet extremes represent how we feel;
Hard to fathom what others call their “in between”, And self-harm’s how the masses still deal.
It’s a push, pull back we constantly fight,
Seeking our place to “fit” in this life;
Battling each day to keep one’s self afloat, While thoughts taunt us to die through the night.
Our need to cling’s between panic and fright,
Distressed you’ll abandon us too;
Highs and lows are endured, but not many stay, Blame, and guilt then sets in us anew.
On the flip side, we love with all of our might,
Shedding doubt for who really does care;
Wishing no other to feel what it is we go through, Giving instead till our hearts are stripped bare.
There are days loneliness still seeps into our soul,
“Good Enough”, such a phrase is unknown;
Isolation sinks in, reality fades,
Fear of abandonment welcomes us home.
But “saving” is not what this poem here is for,
Cause “support” is our greatest need;
Accept that for which has detoured our path, Stand by us till the day we succeed.
Also please refrain from “Get Over It”,
Cause our minds are flipped upside down; Yet persistence, hard work, and our own discipline CAN shift the outcome around!
So instead don’t turn a blind eye today,
But stay put and offer your time;
For together we wield enough power,
To stomp out these stigmas regarding our minds.
Support
One of the biggest needs sought from any of our loved ones is support. Nobody can “save” us but ourselves. That being said, support is crucial to the recovery process, as many times we feel abandoned to fight this war waged within our minds alone. We know you’ll never completely understand our struggle, and that’s OK! It’s acceptance we truly long for. Stand by our side on the journey towards healing. Listen. Hold us when the tears won’t seem to stop. Be compassionate when fears keep us from attending family functions or events. We don’t necessarily need advice but ache to just feel wanted and loved.
So please reach out if you know of a friend, family member or acquaintance who is struggling with this disorder. We want to get better, however, recovery takes time. In the interim, please be aware we’re doing the best we know how to survive this storm thrust upon our life known as BPD.
By: Debra Brent
